9 Comments

"I am the kind of friend who can hold a lot of complicated." So needed. Definitely PhD level skills to be able to just be with someone's pain/grief/complexity.

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Thanks Sri 🙏🏼

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damn this was beautiful thank you for sharing

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Oct 26, 2022Liked by Tarzan Kay

I adore that you acknowledge your own great big heart.

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Oct 21, 2022Liked by Tarzan Kay

I see heavenly beauty in that complexity. :)

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Oct 21, 2022·edited Oct 21, 2022

Once, not that long ago, I googled "how to wish a friend happy birthday" because I was depleted, exhausted and lost for words. The birthday wish I sent on (to be read out of a mason jar of positive messages) was a bit cheesy and hallmark-y. She probably won't know I couldn't pull it together enough to say something from my heart. Still, I never blamed her for having a birthday when I couldn't be the best version of myself. I am sorry your too-muchness is more than some people are skilled enough to manage. Note to reader: Type into a search bar "how to be a good friend" to figure out we all have a part in contributing to the success and failure of relationships. Ps. The money spent on therapy to unfck myself was worth the cost of the tiny apartment in Brooklyn because I benefit from a healthy, courageous, hilarious, extraordinary friendship with you. Your GUTS are my favourite thing about you!

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I am going to google that because I still have lots to learn about being a good friend. I like learning with you. ❤️

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It's easy to love you. 🛶

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This truly is inspiring. You've been through so much. Kudos to you for hanging on and moving forward navigating the complicatedness. (≧▽≦)

I came here wondering if I was being arrogant for cutting out people who disrespected me and didn't value me. (I mean, it should be a no-brainer but I always end up hesistating and worrying that I'm turning into a monster for priorotizing myself). I wondered if I was being cruel for not being more patient with them and for not believing in their ability to change.

But no. After giving and giving and constantly being taken advantage of… I think it's about time my own wellbeing takes priority and my love should only be made available to those who value me like I value them.

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